Define "chronic" masturbator.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
