i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Randomize
