This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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