Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Randomize