tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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