I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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