I didn't shave. On purpose
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize