im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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