Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
