you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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