took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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