She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
