cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Randomize
