And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Randomize
