he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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