you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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