My pussy is not your playground.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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