i think my mom watched the whole time
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize