okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize