yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
