you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
