I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Still dying that you shit outside
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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