Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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