I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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