Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
