love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
