I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
