well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
