Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
