Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
