Barsexuality is the new black.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
