I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Randomize
