what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
