its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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