Pappa wants mamma naked
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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