Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
