shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
