soooo we both peed the bed last night...
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
