walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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