Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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