You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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