sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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