i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Do you have feelings for this penis?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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