my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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