break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize