THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
