grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
