i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
