She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize