Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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