I just made out with a guy for $7.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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